An open letter to my friends, past, present and future….

I drove to Maine a lot this summer. During those drives, I had a lot of time to contemplate, problem solve, and most often, sing, lol. But something that never seemed to escape my brain during those 4 hour drives were all of the people that have traveled with me in my life (figuratively and literally). Maybe it was seeing so many friends tie the knot or maybe it was just one too many How I Met Your Mother episodes, but I have always wished that I was better at staying in contact with the friends that helped to shape me as a person.  I envy those people who have grown up with their very first friend, a bond that is usually as strong, or sometimes stronger, than family.

asked if I knew you

I know it sounds sappy, and a bit naive to think that people will stay friends forever. People grow apart, life gets in the way and phone calls, texts, emails, and yes, even the old fashioned letter, don’t happen as often and never seem like enough.  Maybe I am just having trouble adulting, that’s certainly a possibility.

But in a world that rarely values what’s old and is forever becoming more cynical, I just want to say something.

I think about all of you and hope you are living a life that makes you happy.

I hear a song, or find a picture.

I drive by my old exit, or a pizza shop we used to go to.

I stop for a coffee at our usual haunt downtown.

Your post pops up on my newsfeed celebrating something important.

And I want you all to know that I am thinking of you.  I miss our friendship. I miss laughing over nothing, keeping confidences, road trips to anywhere and late nights in.  I wish the adult version of you and I could sit down for coffee or wine and just rewind for a few hours. I quietly celebrate your accomplishments and support you from afar during the tough times.  When you think that you have no one, know that I am still thinking of you.  Think of it as an unspoken long distance friendship.

It may have been decades since we giggled in our pjs, but know that I wish you well.

And to my friends present and future, thank you for adventuring with me. Life is hard and living it with you makes it a lot easier. Know that if we ever part, you will share the same long distance friendship.  I will think of you kindly and wish you well from afar.  I will keep your confidences and giggle at our inside jokes. I also hope that just doesn’t happen.

I find that as a I get older, it is harder and harder to make friends. Maybe I’ve never been very good at it and circumstances have just favored me and blessed me with wonderful people. Maybe adulting just makes it hard. But I think friendship is sometimes taken advantage of and neglected.  I know that I have neglected friendships over the years and I wish that I hadn’t.

This post isn’t meant to be sad, maybe just a little nostalgic. But mostly, it is meant to be supportive. Friends are important.  They teach you, love you, support you and make life a little sweeter.  I’ve always been a firm believer in the saying that “I’d rather have 4 quarters than 100 pennies” but I also know that people cross our path for a reason.  I’m just glad you crossed mine.

and if you ever want to get that coffee, just let me know….

new world


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